The head are about to explode, your body-temperature rises and you feel dizzy. You sit on the subway, the time is around 22, youths, bear and bottles, mobilephones playing out loud and you try to turn up the volume on your Ipod. One voice are received as a 1000 in your head. The whole world are spinning and you don’t know what to hold on to, neither what or who to reach out. There is a feeling of panic as you find yourself in a confused position.
At the stir-cases up to central station I felt an eager for Mc Donalds, when sitting there with my cheeseburger small fries and a coke I felt a common feeling. Whenever I´ve been out traveling and reach that point when you feel totally empty, or overloaded, and don’t know anything, then I always goes to a western place like Mc Donalds it calms me down and comforts me. I know that it might sound strange and I have never put it together until now when I did it again, but this time at home. To me it is amusing. Maybe it stands for regularity, continuality and I know what I am going to get.
Have to go for a meeting, then home take a bath and make some decisions, before I finish up some radio editing.
I don’t know if it is worth to dig deeper into the panic attacks or if it is just this that is the solution, to find a way to handle it. What surprises me is that it comes up now, ok I have tricky decisions to make, but I took a day off yesterday, chilled out at home until 19.15 when I went down to sickla shopping and bought supplies of make-up and some clothes then I cleared groceries (my status was one milk and a few berried in tee refrigerator) and bicycled home, had a shake and cleaned up my apartment watched an episode of Sopranos and fell asleep.
Cant get a hold of the logic.
Well, either way I have to go for my meeting
Amazing - do you really have bears in the Stockholm subway?
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